Syndey carton

So i have been dealing with Sydney for a while now and he won’t stop and i don’t know what to do. I don’t love him because he is just a mess that i honestly don’t want to deal with at all. He is very lonely and that is definitely a reason i would consider trying to help him but i just can’t see myself doing that and being uncomfortable with somebody i don’t have feelings for. He is a great man and everything but his drinking is out of control and he needs help. He is too lazy and needs to change his life because I’m afraid i can’t do that for him. I think that he does have potential to succeed in life but he keeps bringing himself down by drinking and drowning in self-pity. Also the fact that he doesn’t love his own self gives me the feeling he will never be able to love me if he will never love himself. Whenever Sydney gets up and tries to get his act together then maybe, just maybe, i will give him a chance and see if i am even close to being capable of loving him. I don’t think i could ever forgive myself if anything ever happened to Sydney, and at the rate things are going for him right now, I would not be surprised if he tried to hurt himself because he is just so depressed and lonely. Someday me and Sydney can or will be close, just not now and not when he is like this. He needs help and like i said it won’t be mine.

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